From Chronic Indecisiveness to Trusting Your Intuitive Inner Authority
““Trust your instincts. Intuition doesn’t lie” ”
I've taken countless personality tests over the years in my quest to understand myself. But it all started with horoscopes—I was completely into them. I used to be able to guess someone's star sign after a single conversation, though I couldn't do that now.
As a Libra, I remember reading a book in my teens that claimed "you are naturally indecisive." I immediately agreed with such conviction! But I've since discovered that my indecisiveness wasn't really a Libran trait—it's actually a common highly sensitive trait.
The Pain of Chronic Indecisiveness
For years, I was chronically indecisive. I felt like I was wasting my life going in circles, endlessly weighing the pros and cons of every decision. My mind would circle and circle, never reaching solid ground.
It was painful, exhausting, and infuriating. That's not to say I lacked opinions altogether—I had strong convictions about what felt right and wrong, and I wasn't afraid to express them. But when it came to making decisions—whether big or small—it felt like absolute hell.
Should I go out tonight? What training should I do? Which skirt should I buy? How do I feel about this person? What should I eat? Round and round on the merry-go-round I went, tying myself in knots in the maze of my mind.
Why Was I So Indecisive?
The root cause became clear: I wasn't in touch with my inner authority.
I was constantly influenced by what everyone else thought. I was hyper-aware of other people's feelings—if they were worried, I was worried. Then came the fear of getting it wrong. Because I lacked confidence in hearing and believing my own truth, I would wonder: what if everyone else was right?
I was also preoccupied with how my decisions would affect others. Before I even knew how I felt, I would run to check in with everyone else, figure out their feelings, and only then try to work out my own. This just made everything more confusing.
Learning from Decisive Women
What I noticed was that I had befriended instinctively decisive women—women who just seemed to know what they wanted and would simply decide. I would watch them in awe, thinking, "How are they doing that? How do they know what they want so quickly?"
The answer was simple: they were in touch with their inner authority. They trusted their instinct, their gut, their first thought or response. They could listen to their body and just know. These women became my teachers, though they never knew it, teaching me by osmosis.
I loved those fierce female characters in films who just knew what they wanted and acted fearlessly. Watching them made me glow. Even now, my husband rolls his eyes and laughs every time I pick a film with a strong female lead—it still lights me up.
The Part of Me I Was Ignoring
What I didn't realize was that I was actively ignoring my own inner wise woman, the fierce aspect of myself who knew how to say no. This was the aspect of my intuition that needed to be heard, but I had locked her away in an internal cupboard.
She would burst out in my dreams. She'd cut my dream hair off to signal the end of a relationship, and I'd wake in a sweat, understanding the message but still ignoring it. Or she'd crush my gut into a ball when I considered taking things further with a partner who wasn't right for me.
I was terrified of her—but only because I was so out of balance. I only listened to the "nice" feelings, the kind responses. I ignored the anger rising within me that said, "No, I'm not happy about that."
To listen to my intuition meant listening to my no, and that felt frightening.
The Turning Point
After a big breakup in my mid-twenties, I made a decision: I would let my intuition lead, and I would follow. That's when everything changed.
I realized my intuitive self had been trying to:
Protect me
Guide me toward real, authentic connections
Help me express my gifts at their highest level
Support me in finding satisfaction and happiness
Give me vital information
But I had to listen. My indecisiveness had come from overthinking and trying to ignore what I knew because:
It might not fit with my plan
It wasn't what my heart wanted to work out
It seemed "not nice," even though it was honest and true
I gave up trying to fight myself. I stopped resisting my intuitive knowing. And suddenly, life got easier.
Decision-making gradually became less of a thing, less of a secret issue I had to wrestle with in the background. I started learning to trust the unknown, to trust myself, to understand that I needed to let go of the plan and simply listen.
The Practice and the Payoff
It all took time and practice. I trained myself—over and over—to feel my intuitive knowing, to trust it, and to take action on it. That's what I've been doing for the last 18 years.
Now, I don't think anyone would call me indecisive. My husband actually finds it hard to believe it was ever true! But it was. Learning to listen to, feel, and trust my intuition changed everything—it changed my life.
What's surprising now is that I rarely see this aspect of myself, the fierce crone, because I've fully integrated her. Unless I've been ignoring an issue, in which case she has something to say, especially during my cycle. Or if I meet someone who needs a wide berth, she just growls—and I know, I listen, and I act.
These days, what looks like indecision is simply not having all the information yet. But I trust the process. I might have a clear intuitive yes or no, and I act on it—even if I don't fully understand why or can't see the complete outcome. I just know the direction to go. It's a sense of knowing without needing to know everything first.
Before, I wanted certainty. I'd overthink endlessly, trying to control the picture. Now, I'm willing to take the leap—or at least the first step—without seeing the full landscape ahead. The practice of feeling, knowing, trusting, and acting has become my foundation. And it's set me free.
The Journey
The journey from indecisiveness to inner authority isn't a quick fix—it's a real transformation that takes commitment and practice. But it's absolutely possible, and it's absolutely worth it.
If you've ever felt trapped by indecision, know that there's another way. Your intuition isn't meant to confuse you; it's meant to guide you toward a life that feels true. The fierce, knowing part of you is already there, waiting to be heard.
Always listen to your inner knowing. Drop the overthinking. Learn to listen and take action.
If this resonates with you and you want support in learning how to listen to your inner authority through intuitive awareness, I invite you to explore my upcoming Intuitive Training Level 1.
